I must admit that I am frustrated at God. I am sure God doesn't care. He is probably laughing at me. But although I am frustrated, I know one thing... God never promised me or the man in which I speak a home anywhere near the grand city of Comfort, California. That is with God or without God.
To be frustrated with God is a very humanistic idea though, but still I am frustrated. It is probably a sin to be frustrated at God or with God. To even ask the question, what does it profit me to be abstinent, is even more human, but we all ask it to some extent.
I know all of this. I hear it from the pulpit every Sunday, "all us humans do is ask the question, why me? why me? why me?, it's about God and everyone else, but ME! The world teaches us to ask that horrible little question, WHY ME, GOD? It's bad, steer clear of it."
But dang it, why him? He has given everything in his life to God, a career in the ministry, no money, a son that is the clichéd preachers kid, and just about everything else you can imagine. All of that health and wealth bull shit you hear on TV, just don't sit right with me. I have seen the exact opposite get naked and take a bath right before my eyes.
You might be saying as you read this. "Well, the man that you are talking about must be in sin. God does provide a healthy and wealthy life for those who believe." I will kick you in the face.
I have seen a man give everything in his life to God. He remained abstinent until he was married and never thought about doing any different. The man was diagnosed with prostate cancer, had his prostate removed, can't get a hard-on, and his wife is now a wino because the lack of intimacy just isn't there. So here, I am going to be human. I am going to be an immature adolescent who just doesn't understand what I am sure you do understand. Why him? What does it profit me to be abstinent? What did it profit him to be abstinent? I have his genes, his fathers genes, my mothers genes, her fathers genes. I never even met her father and I wasn't old enough to say I love you to his father, but yet, there it is. I am being over shadowed by the past, by scientific rules and tendencies that will probably be the death of me.
I don't think that you're wrong for questioning God. I think that God probably has a slight grin on his face when He receives your questions. If I were God, I'd probably be pleased with the fact that you asked all kinds of questions instead of apathetically accepting everything the preachers and the like told you with a blank-face and a couldn't-care-less attitude. So don't assume God is going to debunk you or be irritated with you because you're human. And trust me, I bet the abstinent man thought about sex way more than you realize. Even the best of humanity most likely thinks about it at some point-- God told Adam and Eve to multiply the earth, thus giving them sexual desire-- so of course humanity struggles with sexual desire. It's not like it just jumps out of a good man when he gets married and then and only then expresses or manifests itself in some form. It's always there-- or at least once the lad hits puberty.
ReplyDeleteAnyways, I think that God wants us to be abstinent for many reasons, but there are two reasons that stick out in my mind most prominently. The first reason is that marriage between a man and a woman is supposed to reflect the covenant that believers have with Christ. Christ is faithful to the church. A husband is supposed to be faithful to his bride. Christ sacrificed Himself for the church... A man is supposed to sacrifice himself (or remain abstinent) for his wife... so that he may give himself fully and wholly to her.
Not saying that a man who has had sex with another woman won't love his wife just as much as a man that hasn't had sex-- but I hope that makes sense. I wish I could explain it better but there are others out there who can explain it better than me.
To be honest, I've struggled with this same concept. I've stated to myself, "well if I really love the person, how is it not ok to forgo abstinence and express my love for them physically? I know the Bible says 'don't'-- but seriously.." and my answer to that question, now, is this: When I find the right person, I don't want to say, "half of my heart went to this person, and half of my heart went to that... I have one-fourth left for you, and only you. Sorry I didn't really consider you when I was in the moment then." I guess what I mean is, when I marry someone, I want to be able to give them all of myself, and say truly and honestly, I have been waiting for you.
Seeing that abstinence transcends the physical loss of virginity, it's possible for a person who regrets having sex with someone to change and choose to abstain from sex till they meet the right person.
Basically, i'm not trying to be harsh or judgemental here, I'm trying to say that I think about my future husband a lot of the time. I pray for him, and I look forward to sharing something with him that I haven't shared with anyone else.
P.S. Those who suffer here are rewarded in heaven for what they've suffered for... :) Forgive my long and drawn-out reply.
I know Brit :). My post is 100% human. It is selfish and full of everything a Christian is supposed to hate. Overall, thats what it is... human. We are selfish creatures and we represent everything the Christian should despise. I am glad you said what you said. I am not saying abstinence is right or wrong. The point really isn't abstinence at all, it's just human frustration. Every human rants like that every now and then, thats the beauty of it. We all have people we love, and unfortunately we have to see them sick or dying or dead. I really don't think God would punish us for asking that question? Do you? The thing is Britt...a person shouldn't expect a life of simplicity or pure comfort because they gave their life to Christ. It's simple and very clichéd', but good things happen to bad people and bad things happen to good people.
ReplyDeleteNo, God's not going to punish us for our questions. I ask Him crazy questions all the time. :) And to be honest, about suffering-- Jesus said that those who gave their lives to Him were promised suffering. He didn't say they might suffer-- He said, "it WILL happen, get ready for it." I don't think humanity realizes what the point of all the "rules" found in the Bible are. I've been reading Romans and teaching it for Bible study on monday nights and if you read like... through chapter 5ish, it saws that the law is meant to show us what God is like and what He desires vs. what we are like and to show us how far we miss the mark. It's meant to show us how much we need God, not to throw a pile of rules in our laps. It's been fascinating, really. I think it's one of the most complex, most profound, and yet most comforting books of the bible. Especially Romans 7, where Paul basically says, "I love sin and I can't stop... I'm dependent and thankful for Jesus who will help me to desire to do His will."-- that looks a lot different than what most Christians will say today... it seems a lot of them are afraid to admit they're human and that they fail. But it's completely ok, because of God's grace and mercy, to wrestle with our failings and to be human and rant. We were born human, no matter how "good" we are, it will always be at the core of us. The beauty in it all is accepting that we were never meant to be super-humans, we were just meant to cling to God and to hold onto the fact that everything we got wrong, and everything we can't possibly do in our limited bodies and minds, Jesus did.
ReplyDeleteSo question God, please. Present your ideas, arguments, and thoughts to Him... it's better than not having Him in mind at all. And I'm sure that He's mindful of you, too. That's the thing, we're small and finite, and yet He cares for us, immensely. Ask on, I'm pretty sure God smiles at your petitions from time to time.
And if Christians are supposed to hate anything, it should be hatred of those who, with their "religious vigor", maim and cripple those who genuinely want Christ, but don't have a shiny-enough Bible with the right engraving, or don't join enough Bible studies or have enough bumper stickers about Jesus on their cars. I'm exaggerating, of course-- but God's love is too vast for our understanding... and I think the church understands that-- I mean the church that truly loves God and loves people.